And that you STILL hear even as a fully-fledged adult.

I’m not the first, and I won’t be the last, but oh, the topic is current. How to be a Redhead‘s Instagram page provides regular relief in the form of witty, saracastic, to-the-point memes, and, of course, there’s always a gif or two out there.

I’ve never been teased because of freckles, or my hair colour, but I was bullied plenty for other things, so the sensation is not unfamiliar. However, to this day I don’t expect comments related to my red-haired existence in particular. Is it confidence? Healthy self-awareness? Reasonable disinterest for other people’s opinions? No time? Occupied with my own thoughts?

I’m still undecided what fascinates me more, the open rudeness of some of what comes my way, or the fact alone that people insist on spending their time pressing what they think is an issue or an excuse for a chat.

Whenever the comments do come, it’s always a bit of a surprise. Sometimes I leave them be, but sometimes the person commenting is demanding. They repeat the comment. They can’t let it go, like Elsa, but I don’t have time to recommend they watch Frozen. And that’s when I employ one of the following kick-ass responses (or inner reactions).

Comment Category Number 1: Hair

Did you do something to your hair? – No.

Really? Seriously, did you do something to it? It looks different. Why does it look different? – I washed it.

Was this always your hair colour? – Yes.

You didn’t dye it? – No.

You sure? – …

Category Number 2: Skin

You’re so pale. – Actually, I’m fair.

Well, that’s what I mean, I guess, but are you feeling OK? – …

Do you tan? – Not really.

What, not at all?

Comment Category Number Three: Style (Sort Of)

Wow, you wear red? With your hair? – Yes. I did it so you would ask.

Pale people like us can’t wear those colours. – * Shrug *

You want those shoes? But you’re so tall! – Oh, wait, that’s another blog post.

And let’s not forget the crowning glory of all those comments:

“You’re not a redhead! Your hair is brown.”